being me

you know sometimes

it is easy to motivate others

to be better

or give our opinion

to at least make them think wiser

but 

when it comes to ourselves

we forgot what we thought that other

people should do 

to make themselves better

u got what am saying?

in my situation that i can see right now

i always tell others to be themselves

i always say that being yourself is the best option

in whatever situations

and somehow

i might forget that a bit

or most of it

because i am not aware of myself

i am trying to be others

i love to be alone

not like really deeply love "sedalam lautan api " :3

but its more on

i like doing things on my own

like going to bookstore alone

lunch alone

bla bla bla alone

but sometimes i prefer having friends

i mean 

not laa 24/7 alone 

(it's kinda weird if i do so though )

and sometimes

i am so clueless to let others know about this

especially those yg suka stick with me

*bajet retis =.=

because i dont know how to tell them

what i like and dont

coz who the hell i am 

until i should tell them to do this and that

if they want to be with me?

right?

and u know how i realize this?

( the thing that i realize that i think i am not being myself? )

*xtau asal rasa complicated ayat kat atas nih 

when i met my previous roommate

she knows me better i guess

because last semester i always share most of things with her

and she was like

" kenapa nak ikut orang? "

" dulu awak tak macam tu pun "

and i was like

eeeehhhhhmmmmmm =.=

she was right 

because it is so tired to do this and that

and satisfy others

and trying to fit in others' situations

trying to fit in on how they always do their things

etc

since i know i shouldn't

right?

so know

i need to step back

and moving forward to feel the best in me

to let the world following me

*eceh ayat

because i know

i am awesome

and i believe in that

don't you think that

that is what i suppose to do?