WYAO

<12.33 am>

WYAO stands for

WORK YOUR ASS ON

lols

perhaps its is not suitable for some people , sorry

but yeah , lets proceed

This is a special entry for a 'little' girl

she is a friend of mine that I havent meet

perhaps we can meet one day ^^

so now

this will be general since I am sure she will get it

so I have read your 'homework'

thank you for completing it

I appreciate that

tbh , I have a lot to say

since perhaps I have been there done that

so I will just say things based on what I think I should say

(make sure you read and listen to everything that I put in this entry XP)

1) for me , that song brings a lot of meaning towards me.

that was the song when I was totally into them.

that song brings me to one point that I should be on track.

but that aint the only factor. there are a lot ! freaking a lot

but its all up to you on how you want to use it
same goes to anything that you do
its all on you ^^

2) yeah , I will do the same ~ blaming myself for things that I think I did wrong. 

(sometimes I mad at others if I know I am not wrong , 

but I will end up fixing things rather than let it be , 

unless its totally unnecessary)

BUT , I dont agree you saying that you will feel that way .

people do have different kind of ways to express themselves , 

so it doesnt matter , it depends on you

on how you want to open up to others , 

but girl , nobody is higher or lower

everyone is working their ass off to get what they want

you are blaming yourself , that is one thing , 

saying that you feel stupid wont help you though

logically , sit there doing nothing ... okay , you can call that as stupid ><

SO YOU NEED TO REALLY WORK ON WHAT YOU STATED IN NO 3 !

3) For this , THERE , YOU SAID IT !

*clap clap*

but then , if you do nothing 

nothing will change

NOW (pats on you) , I know

its hard when someone that you trust said something like that to you

but seriously , it might hurt sometimes

but as you said , you need to respect them

so keep that respect on

work harder

prove to them that you can do better

make it as a good motivation

sometimes , some parents cant really express themselves 

saying lovey dovey words etc

and them being protective perhaps seeing that you are still young

I know you wont rebel , but trust me

they are just giving time for themselves

to let of totally get your own freedom soon

now , you are under their sight , protections

nobody will let their daughter hang out alone etc and be on their own

especially at your age

yes , they wont provide you step by step 'procedures'

but then

its up to you on how you want to adapt to it
you are a grown up girl aint you? 

expectations ... I dont think people would love to have it

yes , I hate it too

but without it

you will not accomplish anything (good expectations I meant)

4) being compared ...well , i think its normal

but nah , just....listen and keep on

well , I know it is not easy

but , there is nothing that you can do but to strive !
ITS ABOUT THE WAY YOU ARE <--- lols , am listening this now ><

these are my answers to answers that you gave me based on what I give you ><

REP UP

<THIS>

I know you understand this better than me

I know how music works best on us

now , I guess this might work on you

coz it is on me ><

okay that wasnt the last part though

I have a lot more

lols , you should know how 'noisy' I am

everything is depends on you

its not that I havent face what you are facing now

what I did was , I study hard

mine was when , if I didnt pass that

I need to extend my time from entering degree

now , you still have a semester to go

which will be easier

you still have time

you have done your best for the past three semesters

just , a slight "mistake" is done for the last sem

so , like you said , you blame yourself

so now , will blaming yourself only; bring you something?

no right?

you gotta study from now on
use this holiday to work on that paper , study early

I have seen my friend with 4 papers

now he needs to extend way longer than you

so be grateful

that Allah tests you with a small test

or perhaps big , idk

but one thing about me

I am not saying that I didnt complain on things

I do

but I know I wont do that only

I know I have to strive to get things back
to fix things back
then thats how you can make everyone proud

You know
success is universal

PEOPLE CAN ONLY ADVISE YOU

ITS YOU TO WORK ON IT

=D

I know you can do well

trust yourself more

be confident

try to prove to yourself that you can be better than 

what you are now

dont compare with others much

it helps nothing

I know I didnt help much

but I hope you wont give up that easily

I hate it if someone that I care do things like that

it hurts me

I am striving here

so I hope you will do the same ^^

now this is for you :)

<OMG , I am so gonna cry for having emoshinki rn, lols *hug you>

me

<A little Cassiopeia>

<1.26am>

Contengan

1.45 pagi

banyak sangat perkara nak dirungkai

external aku rosak

aku kena format

jadah semua benda aku kumpul bertahun 

hilang kejap je

nangis tak berlagu aku

lately

aku tak sempat nak kejar benda lain

whatsapp kbnyknnya aku tak reply

call pun housemate sbb nak balik etc

and home ( I miss home so bad )
*praying for my little brother for his SPM , I know he is doing his best*

debate aku kena kejar juga

ada tournament bakal menyusul

aku malas sbnrnya

tapi keadaan dan tenaga kerja itu kurang

assignments bersepah

kebanyakan aku buat sorang

aku tak kisah

tapi dalam hati menyumpah

aku buat dgn kawan lain

dia ada , tapi tak datang

sudahnya hanya menaip

aku menyumpah tak habis

bukan satu assignment je dia buat macam tu

aku rasa nak mencarut kat dia

tapi tak boleh

dia nak membahan , tak tgk lagi aku bahan orang macam mana

aku tak tau nak fikir apa
jadi aku diam
tunggu masa
yang lain pun tahan sahaja perangai dia
markah atas usaha orang
tak rasa bersalah ke?

aku geram semua benda

kuiz aku markah teruk gila

mid term jadual macam apa

aku nangis habis paper sebab serius macam final

tambah satu carutan sbb mmg aku akui

pentadbiran fakulti agak lemah dari segi ini

banyak lagi benda aku tak sempat buat

AGM tak buat lagi

CCM talk tak de lagi

debate tournaments lagi

presentation bersepah macam jadah

study lagi

final nak dekat dah

membahan kenapa kelas akhir sem kena blended sebab

budak dip nak masuk

padahal awal sem tu diorang tu final jugak

kitorang tak de kelas kot awal sem tu

kena ganti kelas sebab diorang

apa jadah suruh pindah fakulti macam tu

diorang duduk kolej kot

bagi je la kelas petang

macam **** je asyik nak mengalah

okay sorry

suatu perkara

aku tak suka commitment buat masa skrg

komitmen nak datang awal

komitmen nak cakap baik2

komitmen nak kena belikan top up utk orang padahal aku ada hal

etc

perkara remah , waktu busy

andai disentuh

diam mungkin perkara terbaik

for anyone

kalau ada sesiapa yang terasa ke

aku jawab macam nak tak nak

kalau kau tanya pasal assignment

kalau kau kata perkara yang aku dah kata aku tak suka

etc etc

aku biasa tak jawab , hanya diam

nak marah ke apa tak reti

aku tak tau la aku ni jenis apa

nak whining pun sorang2 kat sini lah
maaflah
aku memang begini

kadang

banyak sangat aku mengalah

pendam sendiri

aku tau , ada juga perkara yang orang mengalah

for me

tapi tak semua

aku hanya mampu doakan kebaikan utk mereka yang buat baik kepadaku

for years I havent meet my best friend

for years I didnt meet the one that I trust the most , but he left me

for a lot of things that I keep to myself

for everything that I can just pray the best for

what else others expect me to do?

I cant even handle myself

now what?

I hate expectations

I cant split myself and faking things

I am tired of it

for once I did it

I lost my trust entirely

for once I was hoping

I can just look at it and stare , do nothing , cry

now what?

I am not strong

I am tired

I know Allah gives me a lot of chances

I know that Allah knows that I can face all these

but for once , what I need is

space for me to be myself

for others to compromise how complicated I am

when I can consider about theirs

maaf , entry campur bahasa

aku tak perlu perjelas semua perkara

orang hanya akan faham surface sahaja

faham bagaimana pun mereka

mereka tiada di tempat saya

Halwa telinga pagi ini

Korean Version

Chinese Version

me , 2.41 am

Annyeong ~ fanbase

For things that I have put my heart to it.
For a place that I decided to stay when my heart is broken because of 'those' people.
This fanbase helps and makes me feel a lot of things.

Thank you for these 9 months.

I will cherish every moments there.

Annyeong.

MID TERM EXAM is coming ~~~

 

 

I don't even realized that we are in the middle of the semester now

time flies without any pace

 

so its next week

and I am hella scared

lot of stories told that if we cant score

tendency to fail is high

and you know

when you are stressed with a lot of works to be done

and studies

of how you want to coop with things etc

This is when you feel that everything is creepy

 

there come a time when you feel like giving up

trust me , I am not that strong

I feel like sleeping the whole day

that my body is so tired to everything

but then

YOU CANT

and you have no option but to stay up

 

that might sound creepy

but whatever

that's life

and you are a student anyway

lol you cant say anything but strive

 

well

that's basically what I can say to myself

to at least stay awake

I cant play around

but I STILL PLAY AROUND

(though it is not , well whatever)

 

Am trying my best here

will try my best

please , strive with me

 

GAMBARIMASHO !

 



Factors ~

Tbh. If you talk about how I get the motivation. Throughout the entries. Yes I did say that B.A.P and DBSK thought me , but they are not the only factors.

When I am stress and feel demotivated , there are few things that I will do. Yeah , this to praying to Allah. That should be the first.

Other things...

1) call my mom. Thats the easiest way and fastest for me
2) tell my friend about it
3) do whatever that i wanna do until i feel motivated. This depends on the mood and what I feel at that moment
4) etc

Sometimes , when we brag about sth , doesnt mean that is the main focus of ours. Well , its all on you and its you who decide.

Good luck for mid term test , dear myself ~

for?

You have been calling your boyfriend since morning

and now its almost 5am

what are you talking on the phone for the whole day

freaking everyday?

thats the thing that I always wonder

when I see my housemate doing that

most are doing the same I think

which IDK if I can manage to do that when I am in love

well the specs might be different :P

for some spaces

if your lover is at a different time zone

then perhaps that makes sense why you are on the phone

at freaking 3-5am

because for sure you wont be on 'expensive' call all day long right?

or perhaps

you are in the same country

and just .... well

its not wrong

but I wonder

perhaps you should just sleep

lols

why am I complaining this when I dont even sleep now?

I just thought that ....

well

I never say that it is wrong

because I do understand

that you want to stick around

just , perhaps

I cant take it when

people touch your sleeping time

lols

okay bye

[ENG SUB] ARASHI - DEAR SNOW PV

INFO

"Dear Snow" is the 33rd single by the Japanese boy band Arashi.

 It was released on October 6, 2010 on the J Storm record label.

 It was used as theme song for member Kazunari Ninomiya's film 

Ōoku: The Inner Chambers.

( CR : WIKIPEDIA )

RELEASE DATE  : 6 OCTOBER 2010

ALBUM : BEAUTIFUL WORLD

This is a video subbed by me and translation is credited to owner ( stated in the video ).
I really love this song. its so deep , seriously , this song is lovely.

hope the link works well

Thank you.

DOWNLOAD

PASSWORD : ADS
( make sure that its all in CAPS LOCK )

my miserable thoughts and solutions?

 

 

Hello bloggers

I think this entry will be a bit longer

I am saving all my thoughts in one post lols

hope you don't mind

 

main idea for this entry is what I thought about my surroundings

well , I have a lot

I am going to focus on two

 

 

 

1)  STUDY

 

Few days back

my partner and me are rushing for an assignment

we sent it a bit late

(okay  , that was our fault too)

but here is the story

 

what happened that day was

it was all arranged

but I did not print the document yet

and since it is documents for incorporation of an organization

thus , it is a lot to be done

and we have classes before from morning to evening that day

( submission day )

tbh , Alhamdulillah that our last class was cancelled

so we have some time to edit a bit and print

andddddddddd

my printer was run out of it's ink !

and my partner's too

the there are few documents left for completing the assignment

since there is not much options at our faculty

we have to find other option which to go out from uni

and find printing shop

so I stayed at the campus and my partner look for the shop

( we are doing this with my classmates too - they were with their partners )

 

after all the rush

we did finish it ( yeay )

 

what I want to write is what I see things around when all these happened

I do understand that my partner is the busiest girl ever

since she joined I think most communities and student council's etc

and she can still manage to do everything with me

 

and remember when I said that we are doing all these with our classmates?

there is a gap when my partner is out looking to where they can print the doc

so me and my other friend went to perform our prayer

after we finished it ( I have to admit it that we are a bit rushing )

and there is a moment when we stare at things

and my friend said this

 

 

" syaf , don't you think that we are so busy with all these things and can't really khusyuk with our solah? "

 

I replied

" ikr , even if we perform our prayers , there are things keep on pop-ing in our head on things that we need to settle "

 

~ END on the conversation ~

 

 

I do take that deeply

I am happy that Allah loves me by sending people around me to remind

me on how people can sometime forget

that all these things that we do

its because of HIM

 

come to think on it

we are studying because of HIM

we are able to live because of HIM

we are alive today is because of HIM

we can beat others and say we are good , because its HIM whose giving us that ability

we can shed tears sad scenes is because HE gives us feeling

reminding that we need HIM in our live

 

even if we are busy with all the responsibility

its to HIM that we need to come back eventually

 

 

 

 

2) INTEREST

 

well

I think if you always read my entries

its all full of KPOP etc

of how 'hardcore' I am with my idols

of how I admire them etc

of how they always teach me etc

of how I am mad when others saying bad things about all these things

 

I think most of you have come across that

 

' IT's NOT EASY TO CHANGE '

 

yes

I admit

I am changing a bit

I lessen my interest

but I am not saying that I am stopping or hating all these

 

I always see things differently

perhaps because I am too deep ( lols , I am not sure )

I still admire them

for all positive vibes that they have

but I am also a fan that understand

all these people are also human

I cant admire them forever

I cant let all these thought to fight for these people forever

because I have my life too

but I don't say that I wont post anything about them

just , its lesser

 

I only disclose that I am a fanbase admin to my close friends

and in this blog

I think its a responsibility too

just , I think I need some time to quit that position

which I need to discuss with other admin too

but idk if I can manage to do that

 

even now

I rarely online

usually , its only when there is notification

if not , NO

I am too lazy to check

unless I have nothing much to do and I check some times

but then I know nothing about the updates etc

when sometimes its tiring to keep on updating myself

about these human

nam saying?

 

but still I do check on them

just , lesser

and I don't even involve myself much thinking about other groups

since I am not updating?

lols , how am I supposed to explain this

I hope you got this

 

and there is one post

about how being a KPOPer can actually takes you far away from what you want in your life

well , I admit that

KPOP is not 100% bring positive values

to those who are in love with them

but I don't say that you learn nothing from them

its the same to when I love watching anime

 

its all about YOUR DECISION

 

as for KPOP

yes

I have been in a situation when I can even mad to other fans

fighting lalala

which now I think it sounds a bit ... stu**d

of how can I even do that

( but I don't say that you can win me either lols )

and there are time when I can be so 'BUSY' updating things lalala

 

when I am busy with my studies etc

I find that all these hobbies are a bit boring

updating and stuffs

because I have sth prior that I need to focus on

 

I still need to be a better person

OMG , I am so sad

that I cant even manage my financial properly

I still cant even let the phone or device when I am talking to others

I need to learn learn and learn a lot

so that I am not stayed behind

 

there are a lot of things to be done

yes , I am still updating myself

just lesser ( hope you got this )

and I am currently keep on reminding myself

its okay to start a bit late

than never

I might not be changed fully

because I am still me

I will still love all these Korean and Japanese songs

crying for how they are all so good looking etc

 

since I know I learnt a lot of positive things too

seeing how hardworking they are to achieve their position now

how they can be so well mannered around others

etc etc etc

( I can't explain all since its me who see the thoughts )

 

one cant say that you learn nothing from everything around you

that's being ignorant

and that will make you look stupid too ( opps sorry )

 

I meant

lets say

you walk around the town

and see old lady working so hard with her old body

working for a penny

cant you learn and see that

 

" HOW CAN I BE SO LAZY WHEN SHE CAN EVEN WORK WITH THAT BODY? "

 

" WHY AM I COMPLAINING ABOUT THESE SMALL AMOUNT OF WORKS WHEN OTHERS ARE CRYING AND WORKING HARD TO JUST GET A PLACE TO SLEEP? "

 

you can learn and have these thought

by seeing and using the brain that Allah gives you wisely

 

that's why I said

yes its not wrong to have interest

but its up to you on which you should choose or not

 

I might change my thoughts in next entries or arguments

and still posting about my bias etc

hope you wont judge me

 

and

in any entry that I wrote in

If you do think that I wrote it wrongly

or what I did is wrong

please tell me

 

somehow

I am so blessed that I have friends around

who always remind me

to not forget about Allah

and those who understand my interest

but keep on reminding me to not go beyond what it supposed to be

 

 

and I think

I am also stuck with this quote from my best friend

 

" you don't need to explain yourself to others "

 

and I do think I don't have to post the whole thoughts of mine here

since its hard to explain it all to others

 

 

 

to all these people

who are there with me

along this time

thank you so much

 

this entry is filled with my mixed thought

my weakness as human

and my strong side as a person

 

I have what I need in my life

and I will keep on searching and appreciate what I feel

because this is a chance that Allah gives me

to know which is right and wrong

and this process will keep on going

forever

 

A/N : sorry for any wrong said in this entry

thank you for reading

 

 

 

 

because I am not you

I always have a thought that it is good to share everything ON - LINE

which could make others think the same 

as what I think about everything

but I know that I wont do that

I can post or make an entry on certain things

but not everything

that is why

it will be hard to describe me by just reading entries in my blog

all and all

I have different ways to do things

which sometimes make my friend call me WEIRD lols

example

1) assignments  ( refer to a difficult and tough one )

my friend : finish in 2 or 3 days earlier

me : night before / few hours before sending it

(this is because my style of studying is so much different from other people , really)

2) practical letter

my friend : sent it a week before

me : still not send it even now ( but I did email them lols )

3) music's playlist

my friend : mix songs ( language )

me : all KPOP songs ><

etc etc etc

well

I know how I deal with things

I cant force myself to do things

I will plan and I want to do it my way

and usually I will and sometimes it is carried away with emotions

( if any case is suitable to that )

that is why

I am learning to ignore any thoughts

that I think should not be adapted to myself

YES , I can accept advises

but I will filter it on which I should apply

aint it supposed to be that way?

anyhow

I will still write whatever that I thought should be share here

if it annoys anyone whose reading 'em

I cant say anything

because most things wrote in this blog is based on what I thought I should write in

not what others think

a lot of things happened lately

I put my thoughts in my "mind cloud"

I wish to share it with all of you

( in case there are people whose reading my blog )

but time constraint make me feel lost a bit

I need to finish up things

final year is no joke buddy

trust me

I rarely get enough sleep

even if I do (sometimes) , I will still have headache etc

because I cant focus and not getting enough rest

hope I will do well

this semester

ganbarimasho !

too attached

I have to admit that

I am too attached with them

(but I am not sasaeng tho -_-)

sometimes I wonder if others will take me as a 'weird' person

( which I always think that they are )

and I always say that ' I DONT CARE ' 

when I always act that 'I care about whatever that you say' XP

but

perhaps because I am way too immerse into music

and they are part of how I see where motivation comes 

( part of the factors )

since then , I started to reveal that I am a KPOPers

since I am too attached to them

and I am happy that most of my friends know it

and don't really say anything negative about it (tehee)

I am ( which I believe other BABYs do the same ) to the level

that we can even recognize a picture just by seeing at their styles

( because you are updating everything about them EVERYDAY :3 )

or whether it is from haters or not

etc etc

( not gonna elaborate that , it can be a sensitive issue to some )

loving them make me be in different level

somehow I can feel that

but idk how to describe or explain that to you

I can take so much efforts

to edit videos , make a lot of accounts

talk about them

share things that I have with BABYs

( my fandom )

and etc etc

even so

some recognized that

and ask me to be an admin for a fanbase ( based in my country )

showing how I can do to that much

though it is not much

I never meet them

I never go to their concert yet

( OMG , Please come here again T_T )

and I also know that they might / might not know me

but I am just ...

I will be at their back

no matter what

thank you

B.A.P

B.A.P - FIRST SENSIBILITY  ( 1004 COMEBACK ) - March 2014
from left  :  Kim Himchan , Choi Junhong (ZELO) , Bang Yongguk , Jung Daehyun , Moon Jongup , Yoo Youngjae

been looking for the right skin care ?

okay

this is a rare post 

I am now a lot more interested with most skin care products

1) I bought a wrong product which doesnt suit my skin

2) it is costly

3) so I need to learn so I wont buy any wrong product that doesnt suit my skins

to be honest

I read a lot

when I have free time during this holiday

despite being busy with my assignments

and COC , lols

( COC is name of a game - if in case you are curious what it is )

so yeah

I have been looking for products that suits my skin best

and not really costly since

I am still a student

btw 

I was just wondering around youtube

and I found this channel

and omg , I love her videos so much

you can check her channel out

until next time

me , blabbering about other things

bye

messed up ?

 my piling up works -urgh- cries

alright

its freaking the third week

and now , I have started to sleep late

to finish up things

good thing about this semester is

I have to READ A LOT !

I do research before I go to class

and those things in book? 

its no joke that I really need to read it

but , thinking that I am already in my final year

this is like a 'willing' action

that you will 'willingly' do

since you know that you NEED to do it

haha

ganbatte ne

if you wanna score

you have to work hard

think that this is because of Allah

since it sure need to be because of HIM

inshaa Allah

everything will be okay

* I really need to motivate myself a lot *

p/s :

another good thing is

i only have time to spazz or watch anime when all is done

but its only for short period of time

great huh?

idk

haha

Le changes

Tonight I am happy that some of my works are done within a night. We planned to finish up our workshop ( which I at first suggest to finish it earlier and my friends are okay with the idea - oh God. Thanks to all of u ) and we made it !!!

We sure are so noisy discussing on how to finish it and deal with another work at the last one hour.

So , so far ; CSP and TAXATION . we have done our preparations. We did le exercise too which I really like it when we do it together with ur classmates. Shows whether u understood the topic or not tho its only chapter 1 ( its hella crazy since its tough am gonna say --- IF , you dont study of course XP ) .

but if you dont prepare from now , it might be hard later. Be it if people say that u are showing off studying earlier. Like HELLO , who cares. Its not like u r doing sth wrong. Haha

But i am sure that i cant study at home or else am gonna stuck with my animes etc. Lols. Since i know that , i took another alternatives for going to other places to study.

Its 2.19 AM now. Gonna sleep coz i have a class tmr.

See ya readers ^^

mumble XP

So

tbh

I am writing at 5.09 AM

which is bad because its not that I just wake up

but I havent sleep lols whatever 

ignore it

good that tomorrow is Saturday

eh wait , it is today :P 

thus

I am downloading an anime named PSYCHO - PASS

havent watch it yet but I got review saying that it is okay

so I am going to watch it soon

idk why but lately

I am a into all Japanese dramas , manga , anime

love it when I heard them conversing and I can revise what I learnt 

though its not all

and while waiting for that 

I re-customize my tumblr

which I have left for long

( sorry bb tumblr )

but yeah , I am back

and lols , idk when will I be active back

 

and yeah

I am quite busy with a lot of stuffs

supposedly

but still looking for books etc to be real busy

since I really wanna start everything earlier this semester

( aiming for Deans , so yeah )

and other thing

I have slept earlier

and I drank coffee

I have headache because of that

and I dont really care about it

coz i wanna drink it

but I am mad to myself coz i drink it

haha , its complicated

who cares anyway

and I have lot of thoughts to write here

it might be changing to more " accepted " stuffs 

written in this blog

pertaining to my course

which idk if I can make it that way

coz usually I just wrote what I THOUGHT TO WRITE

( which might make some annoyed but idk and idc coz idek any evidences )

but yeah

that is why I might need some feedbacks

if my entry is not sth that you like though

until next next next entry :)