140628 #HappyDaehyunDay , #BAPBangkokAttack and #Ramadhan2014

Salam

and hye to all readers

I know there ain't much people reading my blog

unless for some purposes

but it is okay

I just like posting things and bragging alone :P

so today is 28th June 2014

three hashtags that I have been using today

1) #HappyDaehyunDay

this is the hashtag that we use worldwide for Daehyun's birthday

I did posted mine at my instagram

byane , lately , I usually posted once and that's it

not that much spazzing like I was before :P

( freaking using hashtag to help )

well , for some reason , I turned that way

no blame or offences ><

so , Happy birthday Daehyun

lets fight together , you are at the same as me

so , lets be at the same par at least

don't leave me fighting chasing your achievements alone :)

thanks for being exist Daehyun-ssi :)

cr as tagged

2) #BAPBangkokAttack

this is a hashtag for B.A.P LIVE ON EARTH @ Bangkok

well , I do some updates at / cough / fan ______

and streaming the concert

thanks to the one who share the link

hugs to you

as tweeted by some fanbases

this LOE will be the last for this year

( sobs , please come to Malaysia next year T_T )

and Yongguk tweeted all the places

and write

" EARTH NEEDS YOU "

marks the end of LOE this year

that reminds me of the reason and theme for LOE

when they started the journey at the early year

( I missed when I spazz a lot about you B.A.P >< )

3 ) #Ramadhan2014

Alhamdulillah , Allah gives us chances to live

and be in this month of Barakah

Ramadhan Kareem !!! Allahu Akram !!!

( there are a lot of feelings talking about Ramadhan , how I survive surviving my school , the moment of Sahur , breakfasting , at home , schools , getting wishes , surviving all hardships with everyone , omg , tears tearing up , idk , I should be happy arriving at this month , I know , thanks to Allah , providing the chances letting us to keep on gaining His blessings , why we as His servants always take things for granted? why me as a person cant be good enough? As a Muslim , this is something that I am proud to say , that I am a Muslim , but when I think back , there are a lot of things that I need to do , to learn and be a better Muslim. Lets be a better Muslim neh? Lets work hard fighting for His blessing and Jannah ^^ )

p/s :

there are only few days left for next final exam paper

but I havent touch anything since the last paper

feel so blurr and a bit lost today

I need to get back to track ><

yesterday

I whatsapping with my brother

I miss him so much

we talk a lot though that was at 1pm +

haha , take care bro

I do talk to my older bro before my paper

its my routine before any paper

to call my mom , and my older brother

haha

glad that everyone at home are doing great

I need to study I think

People are going to start fasting tomorrow

lets .... get a lot of His blessings this months and afterwards :)

Jaejoong - thank you

I have a lot to say if I wanna talk about him

but I will just make it short

Kim Jaejoong

a simple guy who also growing up and always work hard

to get what he wants

and stands where he is right now

( cr to owner )

I admire him a lot

and of all years knowing most idols

I choose him to be in my bias list

( I have other bias too , but Jaejoong is my UB )

XD

sometimes

I wonder why I choose him

You have all reasons to choose other members too

( since everyone have a high potential to ruin your bias list :P )

I am just ...

I don't know

he reflects myself quite a lot

perhaps on certain areas

but I know through all biases that I have

I know , I can learn sth from them

he always show his smiles

working hard in everything that he do

but he always hide his sadness

although most of us know he is hiding it

but I always thank him

for always being strong and keep on walking forward bravely

As for Jaejoong

we all know his hard works to survive

when he need to decide to start the lawsuit with the 'company'

and settling the case did take such a long time

that I am not sure how long he has endure it

imagine

if fans can cry all hard for things that happened

I wonder how strong he is to survive that alone

( along with other members too )

and as a fan

I do realize that he knows what he did

and we all support him for everything that he does

same to other members too

wishing all of you happiness and success :)

I miss them so much :3

I re-watch COME ON OVER

and watch back how he spends his time with everyone

he always makes me think that

smiling and happiness are sth that you should portrayed

so that , everyone will become stronger too

coming along with the issue that I just mentioned

I am sure all of us

( DBSK and Cassiopeia )

do learn a lot and unite together 

to make a stronger bond

and stronger fandom + family

I did mention to the rest

yes , I am a new Cassiopeia

I need to read and learn a lot

but this family is so strong and supportive

makes me happy and continue staying no matter what

knowing them

knowing Jaejoong

though its only virtually done

I can feel that working hard is sth that we cant complain about

people might say

" well , you could learn and know that fact from nowhere "

well 

each of person have different way to learn things ain't it?

so

Jaejoong and all my biases thought me a lot too

same goes to everyone in the fandoms

as for this entry

I want to thank Jaejoong

for being exist

I know , it must be hard

to do things that you like freely

but I am sure you are strong enough to face everything

along with those who are close to you

keep on doing good music

keep on inspiring us

keep on being you

( I know you always be )

coz , we are all human

and as an idol

you do a great job

I love your voice

I love your determinations

I love everything about you Jae

I enjoyed last comeback of yours

WWW is a great masterpiece !

( cr as tagged)

good luck for this upcoming comeback

I am anticipating for it :)

JYJ Fighting

DBSK Fighting

I will keep on supporting you

Jaejoong , Junsu , Yoochun , Changmin and Yunho

for everything that you do

I always believe

and will wait for the time to come

Always Keep the Faith <3

(cr to owner)

a/n :

I might wrote sth that is wrong

( referring to fact or in choosing the right word)

I hope you can forgive me

there are a lot to tell if it is about your bias aint it?

but writing all cant express it well

since it is depending on how you feel the feeling to yourself

 peace :)

short post - fancafe

I supposed to study

and now I remember to check my level at fancafe

and now its not staying but going down

sobs

now I need to re-submit my application

if I am staying at level 1 , I can't go to expert member

which will be at level 3

gdi

why it has to be now

I hope they will upgrade mine later

idk if I am mad whatever

some already said that I need to re-submit 

since they are changing the rules

some says no I should not

since I am already at level 2

nothing much that I can do

I can only re-submit and see what will happen

I should always check my Daum email as well

not my regular email only

thats all

I need to settle this and continue with my books !

me 

sobbing at 4.38 am

not to worry

just wanna write sth here 

thats all XP


*******************

update :

okay
I have registered my re-submission
and gdi I did it twice
I thought I sent wrongly at first
and I resend it another one
luckily I changed my answer at the second submission
( hope ts accept it , kkk )
uwarghhh , why I need to struggle for this?
and I know I dont mind
but ... ehm

kalau la kau tahu betapa susahnya nak daftar benda alah ni
dangan tak tahu baca hangul nya
nasibla ada orang tolong translate
dengan bantuan google translate juga ye kawan2
aku rasa nak nangis daftar 

but well
at least I succeed it !
hahahaha

lets wait for the result of the submission
if not , I need to keep on applying XP

update at 5.03 am ^^

class trip , mind talk

aku tak tahu la apa masalah

suka sangat update waktu 3 - 4 pagi

mungkin sebab dah terbiasa

ada idea waktu macam ni

atau sebab tak de mood nak buat apa2

jadi menulis nampak macam perkara baik untuk dilakukan

haha , abaikan

semalam aku keluar dengan kawan sekelas

ke ulu bendul

it was all planned

seronok la sebab konvoi ramai-ramai

tapi sekejap je trip tu 

sebab pergi lepas solat jumaat

before maghrib kitorang balik

seharian ni

aku tidur macam tak sedar diri

qadha tidur ke apa aku tak tau

penat macam tak ingat dunia

padahal bukan membanting tulang ke apa

jadi malam nya

konon rasa bersalah

buat bajet rajin study

*padahal tak sedar diri , paper dah dekat

sebab tengok orang lain belajar

aku pun start la belajar

setengah jam belajar

sejam tengok video

hahahahaha

mana la nak buat study group macam ni

aku mmg belajar macam ni

*mampu tgk video sbb aku start awal kot

kot lah :P

aku kalau belajar

kalau agak dah tak boleh masuk

tangan gatal sentuh semua benda lain

main game la apa la

sampai rasa macam ada aura rajin tu balik

tadi dah cover few chaps

tinggal few

and nak buat past year

sebenarnya

aku risau jugak

sebab mula tadi macam tak sedar diri

paper first ni lagi 3 hari

mula konon nak gelabah ayam sebab tak start apa

aku sejujurnya

tak suka tengok orang lain belajar

sebab diorang tumpu sangat 

macam tension aku tengok

jadi tu sebab aku biasa study sendiri

tak kacau orang

tak semua orang jugak

nak share apa dia ada

contoh kau buat latihan akaun

certain je yang rajin nak ajar

di saat kesuntukan masa nak kejar waktu exam ni

tak semua

baik nak dahulukan orang lain

tak semua juga

kedekut tak bagi ilmu yang dia ada

tu sebab

aku mula dan gerak dengan sendiri

kurang lebih

usaha sendiri

kan?

dalam masa terfikir nak exam ni

my fingers did count the time for Ramadhan

dah dekat juga

Moga Allah panjangkan umur kita ke arah bulan Ramadhan.

Inshaa Allah

ini pertama kali aku berpuasa di tempat baru

di kampus dan situasi baru

dua minggu lebih dalam bulan Ramadhan di sini

( kalau dalam kiraan la )

Moga dipermudahkan semuanya

...

belajar tu

bergantung pada tahap kau

aku tahu 

usaha aku mungkin tak banyak

( tu sedih ya Rabb nak mengaku )

sebab aku macam tak serious

makanya

marilah kita study sama2 ye ~

semalam kiki kata

" kenapa nak compare dengan orang ? compare dengan diri sendiri sudah "

well 

thanks for reminding me

lets , be better

in our own way

I am glad

its 4.18 am

just finished printing my japanese script

and editing video which was done hours before

glad

that my skills or experiences in subbing videos can be used here

it tooks me less hours

but since I played a lot

so it took me longer

nvm

we are done with it

I just wanna say that I am glad

thinking back to the start

I am partly in most things in the project

so I am glad

I can't received other's efforts more in all things

thus for this

though I know it is not good enough

but alhamdulillah

we finished it

ahh I am so hungry

but I need to sleep haha

so

oyasumi ^^

p/s :

so you are coming back home next week?

well , my final paper is right a day after that

hope you enjoy home

I know you miss it

glad , that we will be on the same land

again :)

bicara v tulisan

aku ada hadiah

lagu je la mampu

seharian aku dengar lagu ni

( nampak tak main jer kerja dia :P )

aku rasa baik aku attach dari ori channel je la

attach yang dari yg sipi2 macam akaun you tube aku

takut ada yang kena delete video la apa la

faham sangat sebab aku selalu kena

pasal copyright

kbye :P

mohon stop kan lagu di atas bahagian blog
and play this song instead XP

btw aku lupa

aku ada di blog

bajet nak brag pasal banyak sangat akaun di SNS

orang lain pun ada

jujur , aku sampai tak tahu aku ada akaun dkt celah dunia yang mana

tapi kebanyakannya berkaitan minat sendiri 

jadi aku tak kisah sangat

jadi , abaikan

hari ini 

gatal tangan mahu mencoret

aku mahu gelak

semahunya 

akan gelagat manusia

aku tak terkecuali

aku selalu fikir

susah tak nak sentiasa positif?

aku yakin jawapannya susah

jujur

se dalam mana falsafah mana kau pakai

kalau rasa nak nangis tu

nangis jugak

sejahat mana pun kau

nampak kucing kelip buat2 comel

kau cair jugak

( kot la , kalau aku , kucing pun aku tak tau aku rasa apa pasal dia )

berbalik pada para pertama di bawah video

pertamanya , tak semua manusia tu baik

ya , itu betul

siapa mampu jadi malaikat?

SNS

kau tahu

orang akan bertingkah laku berbeza di luar dan dalam

aku mampu perhati

aku tak nafikan

berada di dalam alam maya

dengan pelbagai muka ( pages )

aku nampak at least 60 % atau lebih

macam mana manusia itu berkomunikasi

aku mahu sentuh

mereka yang di alam maya berbeza

dan di dunia nyata berbeza

kadang

di twitter , dia punya beribu followers

di dunia nyata

orang pun tak mahu bercakap dengan dia

kadang

dia tak selalu ada di alam maya

tapi dia still tak bercakap jugak

kadang

kat dua2 dia cakap bnyak

kadang

kadang

.

.

.

and the list go on

aku rasa

aku di list yang ketiga

hahahahahahahahahaha

kbye

ehm

aku mmg bnyk cakap pun

hik

tapi aku tak nafikan

tak semua nak dengar kau cakap apa

dan tak semua akan lakukan apa kau harap dia akan lakukan

sebab ya , semua ada hidup memasing

ehm

aku biasa akan bicara

kat mana yang aku rasa nak cakap

kadang kalau rasa tak nak post dkt twitter

aku post dkt tumblr

atau weibo

atau insta

atau another twitter

atau LINE

atau ...

atau...

atau....

haih

penat la tulis

sebab banyak cakap

semua benda nak tulis

kalau ada yang faham tu bagusla

tahniah untuk anda

haha ^^

luah di sini

sekurangnya

aku tulis

nak cakap

tak semua nak dengar

sebab semua sibuk kan

dan bukan kata tak de orang nak dengar

sebab semua mengelat

tapi tak semua perkara

bicara itu jalannya

...

jadi semalam aku buat akaun soundcloud

semua nak cuba

tak de kerja

dah la malas

main je kerja

tak pe la

aku teruskan cerita

aku buat akaun

aku upload beberapa lagu

dan pagi tadi aku buat playlist

boleh tahan best la jugak

best la buang masa

( kan? <----- konon nak marah diri sendiri >< )

dan aku buat kat asianfanfic juga

yang aku akan update tulisan aku nanti

bnyk sangat nak tumpu

aku rasa nak campak semua idea

terus tertaip sendiri

tak boleh ke?

haha

bnyk perkara

minat aku ni macam nampak tak de kerja

dan buang masa

tapi aku kisah apa

pandai sendiri la

belajar kena ada juga

tapi cerita dia

aku malas belajar

baca je pening kepala

eceh

cuma tu sebab kot

orang tak boleh belajar dgn aku

belajar dengar lagu

malas sikit main game

bosan sikit tgk drama la apa la

update itu la update ini la

oh aku baru habiskan satu anime

dan cerita korea

( cerita tu dah lama tgk , ada bbrp episode je tak habis )

ehm k :P

kesimpulan entry ni

aku malas

cuma tak tahap dewa

haha

ada satu perkara

kalau ada yang baca entry ni

dan meraka dari kalangan sahabat handai

LETS

GET DEAN AWARD FOR THIS SEMESTER

***

lagu di atas tadi
dari kumpulan BTS ( Bangtan Boys )
that was from their latest comeback
before releasing another repackage of SKOOL LUV AFFAIR cd
so yeah
kinda adore these dorks so much :P

bye
rajin nanti
aku tulis lagi
> <

and ouh yeah
title song untuk album tu pun best
nanti la
bila2 aku rajin
aku attach :)

Imy ~

having a lot to be done

I am doing things miserably

lols , sometimes

most times tbvh

I am in a condition

that hardly can get enough sleep

and leisure time?

I am 'stealing' some times to do it

well

some must have been listening to all these stories

tbh , I rarely changed tho

hahahahahahahahahahaha

*cries Han River

right now

when I am 'stress' doing my works

I remember my brother's advice

omg , I miss him so much

when I came back home last time

he only stayed at home only for few moments

because he has commitments with his works

I miss my little brothers too

those innocent , pabo and brilliant brothers

who rarely want to listen to what I said

but will do it eventually

heol

I am just .....

I miss them so much :)

T_T

anyone?

Ton of works need to be done

I know sometimes

what I said or thought 

can't be accepted by some

be it to any entries posted

or anything

I am sorry if I offended anyone

first thing

study is still my priorities

unless I see the way to other priorities at this age

with someone who can commit when anything pertaining to me

I might move the priorities to other things too

need to be understood that

music or other interests are only an interest

yes , I might be obsess

but that's different thing

I am still a human

I make mistake too

it just

this is me

to not take things in sudden

I mean ... not in the state that I want to take anything yet

if I am ready

I will be ready

to any arguments

or anything else that matter

haih

its hard to post or tell people with what you thought

that is why I post it here

at this blog

coz at least

I am still doing the " story telling "

tho it might make some mad at me

idk and I might not care

or I am heartless

idk

sobs

why I always make myself sounds pathetic

haha

I am sorry if I make anybody feel offended

again ... I am sorry

for no solid reason

to unknown person

I am apologizing

for everything

^^

what did you say?

one thing people have to understand is

I am not writing to favor everyone in the world to read it

just ... it is a way to express what I thought

etc etc etc

well

tbvh

I feel a bit messy right now

for those who followed my story

might be knowing about that " i am not comfortable " post

well

tbh

aku kadang rasa bersalah dekat dia

sebab dia masih kawan yg baik

jujur dia baik

tapi aku tahu , batas tahu aku itu

hanya sekadar kawan semata

tapi aku bukan kawan rapat sampai tahap

kalau aku cakap apa aku rasa dkt dia 

adalah sesuatu yg mampu digapai

sebab dia tak rapat

faham tak agak2?

dia macam...

aku tak rapat dgn dia

tak kan tetiba 

" ehm , i dont think i have same feeling towards you? "

tak kan nak macam tu kan?

dia rasa bersalah datang bila

bukan dia yg meluahkan

tapi kawan2 dia

dan aku tak suka

sbb dia menjadi alasan kukuh untuk aku jauhkan diri

sebab pertama aku telah katakan aku tidak selesa

kedua , aku rasa ... " OMFG , CAN THEY JUST STOP? "

ketiga , aku akan rasa , adakah dia yg menggunakan kawan dia utk perkatakan perasaan dia?

keempat , if yes , omg , macam mana hang boleh terfikir benda macam tu?

maaf

entry ni bercampur bahasa

aku tak tau nak cerita dekat siapa

tambah dengan keserabutan dengan final exam

pasal diri sendiri yang tak berapa nak matang lagi ( mungkin )

dan submissions

dan belajar

dan spazzing

etc

aku jadi takut pun ada

sebab contoh

aku buat baik dengan dia

orang ingat aku suka balik dekat dia

FOR GOD SAKE

orang lain sibuk buat apa?

haish

biaq pi la nak baik ka dak

masalah dia la ni , tak salah pun dia suka

aku tak kata pun aku suka dia balik

dah orang lain duk campuq sibuk buat apa?

haa , utagha pulak keluaq

tak , aku tak tau nak kesian ka apa

I cant be free

sebab .... aku dok ada setahun lagi nak belajaq

satgi dok buat orang terasa ... payah

tak

dia bukan permasalahan besar

bagi sesetengah orang mungkin

haish , aku tak tau nak cerita macam mana

dia macam

sbb ... aku tak suka dipaksa

dan tetiba benda ni jadi

hang nak suruh aku react macam mana?

dok paksa diri aku suka kat dia?

la ni

orang yang aku suka pun

kalau tak suka aku balik

aku kena belajar move on

now , if someone like me

I have to force myself to like him back?

on what basis you used to argue with me?

macam mana hang nak suruh aku suka kat orang?

sedangkan aku sendiri rasa diri aku tak terjaga?

bukan aku tak nak ada hubungan dgn orang

cuma ... bukan sekarang

atau mungkin ... aku masih menunggu seseorang?

aku tak pasti

but I can't yell on his face

" i have someone "

since I am not sure myself if I have any

omg

sounds pathetic

but yeah

aku rasa

yang faham aku faham kot macam mana

thaqif , kiki

sobs

kenapa korang belajar jauh sangat ?????

aku nak cerita pun boleh via phone ja

T_T

PSST :

another one

dont talk about things that I know

that you dont know

or you know nothing

coz it hurts me

to let others know sth that he/she doesnt wanna know

just because he/she likes to be my friend

supporting is okay

but if ! 

you talk about things that I love

wrongly

you are so out !

sorry

macam yang orang tahu

aku tak la gila kpop ( lah ... sangat XP )

tapi dia jadi keadaan yang awkward

apabila kau berkata tentang hal yang aku tahu

dan apa yang kau katakan itu salah

dan aku tahu kau tak tahu

atau buat-buat tahu

beza

aku tahu bezanya

kau kena faham

bicara kpop ini berbeza dengan industri lain

sebab kau ber fandom

bukan sekadar suka berbasa basi

nam saying?

pengaplikasiannya berbeza

aku tak tau nak cerita macam mana

dia tak salah nak tahu

dan memang aku akan cerita dengan gembiranya 

kalau kau nak tahu pasal bias aku 

atau fandom atau benda yang aku tahu

ada masa dan nada yang aku akan terima

ia berdasarkan riak dan cara seseorang tu tanya

complicated bukan? haha ~

tapi buat buat tahu

dan membandingkan dengan yang tak setara

kau memang cari naya dengan aku

some says that it is scary

but yeah

you have to understand

it works that way

that is why I am drowning in my own world

IT ENGULFS ME A LOT

WHEN EVERYONE ARE BUSY WITH THEIR OWN PACE

SO ... DON'T SAY THAT IT IS NOT NORMAL TO LOVE IT

SINCE 

IT HURTS ME 

HURTS ME SO MUCH

Happy birthday to Micky Yoochun
byane oppa , it was yesterday
I wish you late
wishing happiness for you
with all my heart

I am praying that your smiles stay FOREVER 

AKTF